@Jandalize: He called me an angel but I'm pretty sure he meant angle because I'm always right.
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@Ideal_Victoria: Guys love it when you rest your head on their shoulder at the movie theatre. Their girlfriends however... not so much.
@dave_cactus: ME: And now to test my greatest invention, the cowtapult! COW: M O O o o o o 。 。 . . . . .
@knot_eye: I just vacuumed my dog to cut down on indoor shedding, if you're looking for a life coach or whatever.
@realHamOnWry: My parents both wear hearing-aids. And I think that's why they're still married...they never turn them on.