@RidiculousSheri: He died doing what he loved, annoying the hell out of me and not believing I would stab him.
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@juliussharpe: After watching "Breaking Bad" and the VMAs in the same night, I think I'd rather my kid be a meth dealer than a musician.
@juliussharpe: My wife bought four grapefruit spoons. You know, for all those times in your life when there are four people eating grapefruit at once.
@rickolantern: *stands on scanner at self checkout, weighing self after keying in mango code, just to see what net worth is in mangoes
@withanewname: *moves heaven & earth for her* *moves more left *more left *little right *little more right *moves heaven & earth back to original spot*