@dshack8: 'He looks just like you' is my favorite way to tell someone that their baby is ugly.
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@sickipediabot: Breaking News ..... international womans day postsponed until tomorrow , as they haven't got anything to wear
@shiksaaa: My boyfriend said he had a Catwoman fantasy. I must have misunderstood because we both wore leather cat suits to bed last night. Awkward.
@Book_Krazy: *Buys world map* *Pins map to wall* *Promises to visit wherever dart lands* *Throws dart at fridge*