@jammiiepants: He says I'm cute when I'm mad. Well he has no idea of how gorgeous I can be.
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@JermHimselfish: In spite of what you might have heard, some pretty magical things happen behind dirty dumpsters in shady alleys.
@KyleMcDowell86: told my girl I was going to a wine tasting, now she's coming and I was just gonna eat a dead bird and some expired cat food behind a Costco
@briangaar: I blow-dried my hair, now it looks like the mane of a majestic lion who is really good at video games
@TimDuffy: Thanksgiving is going to be hard this year because half my family dances to remember and the other half dances to forget.