@roxaroodw: He told me he was uncomfortable dating someone with so much inflatable furniture.
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@ScottLinnen: We have a ghost. Came home and found the fridge magnets rearranged: "I see dreadful people."
@Skullcat: My autopsy is going to be surprising as hell because I am 100% filled with mashed potatoes
@AGreaterMonster: Thinking about implanting a magnet in my chin so I can make a badass beard of iron filings and paper clips. More attractive, yes?
@Josievorenkamp: When someone starts a Facebook post with "there are no words..." You better get prepared because you're about to read a lot of words.