@RowdyBowden: Headed to the gym. Gonna work on my diptroids. My gluteralids. My quadrapeps. Maybe my trapaceptals. Definitely my vocabulary.
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@Sickayduh: "Ma'am, you had twins. They are fine and your boyfriend Chad named them" - Oh no "This is Debra" - aww I like that "And this is Depanties"
@joeljeffrey: My girlfriend said she bought the lingerie for me, but then got upset when I put it on... I dont get women.
@imdaintyaf: Hub: You ready to go? Me: In a minute, I'm beating the kids. [Cut to me just decimating the kids at Mario Kart]
@Scdavis24: Guys, if you have to point your toes to put your pants on, those aren't your pants. Give them back to your sister.