@UNTRESOR: Health level: my credit card company called me about fraud because I bought a vegetable.
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@XplodingUnicorn: 3-year-old: I need a scarf. Me: No, you don't. 3: To tie up bad guys. She needs a scarf.
@AmishPornStar1: I don't know why I always end up behind the old lady who is trying to do a reverse mortgage on her home at the ATM.
@NoorShamma: Jewelry make the perfect gifts because if things don't work out, she can throw them away and make you suffer. Take Titanic for example.