@moxieblogger: Held a newborn baby, was asked if I wanted one. Laughed & laughed all the way to the bar, where I can go because I don't have a baby. So no.
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@LizHackett: Go to a suburban neighborhood, find the meanest mom with the biggest glass of white wine, and bring her to negotiate your new car purchase.
@zachheltzel: "You'll have more fun in high school, Zach."nn"You'll have more fun in college, Zach."nn"You'll have more fun in Hell, Zach."
@Try2StopME: Friend: "Dude, me & my girlfriend are getting married." ME: "Wow! when?" Friend: "Me on 27th April and she on 14th June."