@Bandersnaaatch: Hell hath no fury like this woman attempting to type "scorned" and having it autocorrected to "scrotum" 13 times in a row.
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@Reverend_Scott: [Wonder Woman shows up] Superman: Is she with you? Batman: I thought she was with you? Wonder Woman: Bruce you literally emailed me today
@cwhudson: [dog walking a human] *walks by a coffeeshop with its door open* HUMAN: *tries to sprint in* COFFEE DOG: woah boy *pulls leash* easy there
@LanieLalaBugs: I just want a man who'll drag me to the bedroom, throw me on the bed & do dirty dishes while I take a nap. Is that too much to ask for?