@littlehauntings: hello 911? yes do you think i'm pretty
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@qikipedia: In the 1930s, there was an outbreak of exploding trousers in New Zealand. Farmers had used a herbicide that became explosive when it dried.
@MichaelTrying: How much mint do I have to muddle into this mojito for it to count as a serving of vegetables?
@isabelzawtun: When men ask you out, you say no, and they demand an explanation: buddy what is this, high school gym class, do I need to hand you a note from my mom like "sorry Isabel is excused from dating random men on the bus today"
@rockymomax: [me as a magician] *pulls rabbit from hat* AUDIENCE: ooOoOo *pulls knife from hat* A: ooOoOo *pulls sautée pan from hat* A: NNOOOOOO