@Kalarlis: hello and welcome to Fantasy Football *Dumbledore passes ball to Frodo* *Gandalf intercepts football and eats it*
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@KateWhineHall: "Oh my gosh, this is the biggest donut I've ever seen." "Mam, that's a tire." "Kids, get me a napkin."
@theshamingofjay: I change Siri to a man's voice and now it doesn't answer any more questions and turns off for hours
@valenty__: Leo: *names his child Oscar* Doctor: "Would you like to hol-" Leo: "Say it like we rehearsed it." Doctor: *sighs* "And the Oscar goes to..."