@Dawn_M_: HELLO, FIRST TIME CALLER, LONG TIME LISTENER, OCCASIONAL MURDERER.
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@Sanbel11: When a husband asks you if you think it's possible to love someone forever... "If I find the right person" is apparently the wrong answer.
@TennisShoeBoi: On my last flight I watched a woman in front of me pull out her hair and eat it until I fell asleep. Can't do that in first class.
@marinhubka: [sifting through mail] baby shower invitation? Haha, um no thanks, Linda. I have a regular size shower that I can use whenever I want
@withanewname: Wife: "Bad day?" Me: "Stupidhead boss treats me like a kid." Wife: "Now now *pats head* eat your nuggets before they get cold."