@IAmKatieOrr: HELLO? HELP! I'VE BEEN KIDNAPPED & DROPPED IN A NON-ENGLISH-SPEAKING COUNTRY & I DON'T KNOW- wait. Nm. Fell asleep at Szechuan Palace again.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ToxicProbably: Jeez make one joke about putting cyanide in someone's food and suddenly they don't want you to cook for them anymore
@chuuew: As the zombies swarm, I ask for one last selfie. By the time they realise their dead flesh won't activate the touch screen, I'm long gone.
@therealelp: jesus could get on twitter and be like "fear not, child. i know for a fact that your going to heaven!" and someone would be like "you're".
@Jake_Vig: Dear rock bands, If I am at your show, assume I am both ready and willing to rock. No need to ask.