@brendohare: Hello. I'm the guy who sleepeats thousands of spiders every year and screws up the average for everyone. Sorry for scaring you.
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@BrokenPalabras: Ancient people: turned grapes into wine, agave into tequila, and sugar cane into rum. Modern people: turn soy, rice, or almonds into milk.
@VikeeysSecret: Got a passcode lock that takes a picture whenever someone tries the wrong code to look in my phone. I now have fifty pictures of drunk me.
@treydayway: I stopped trying to be a thug when I found out there was something called a caramel Frappuccino.
@Not_From_Troy: My ambition is to be the last man on earth so that I can find out if all those girls were telling the truth.