@eyeswidebutt: Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. I would like to invite you to play Candy Crush.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@trentistweeting: "doctor, help! my son shattered one of his kneecaps!" it's ok, the human body can survive on one kid-knee
@MourningGlory_: Saw some girl pull up to her mailbox, open her door & then fall entirely out of her car while reaching for the mail. JK It was me.