@utofellatio: Henry constantly confuses sleeping people with dead people. Henry is also a necrophiliac so things get awkward for Henry quick
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@LoveNLunchmeat: Every time my daughter drinks juice she says "cheers" so.... no, not looking forward to parent teacher conferences.
@TheFearBoners: I have to put reminders in my phone for everything or I'll forget it. Like 'pick up milk,' 'go to bank,' 'you don't hate minorities.'
@djdarrellripley: Her: I can't cook because, I "believe" I can't cook. And you want to know what makes me believe that? Me: The arrival of the paramedics?