@OakHill_: *teaching 13 to cut the grass Me: Go back and forth across in straight lines, slightly overlapping so you don’t miss any spots. Got it? 13: Yep 13: *cuts three circles, two triangles and a Rhombus into the yard.

@reesespiece_: The door to door bible people just skipped my house! See, all it takes is trying to kiss the guy and he wont be back (until 3am)

@AndyAsAdjective: my dance moves can best be described as "did that dude just try to leap frog?" & "whoa that's a lot of blood" & "is he still alive?"

@HomeProbably: I hate it when I'm by the window and make eye contact with someone outside, so I understand why this lady is shocked to see me up a tree.

@XplodingUnicorn: Me: You need to eat vegetables instead of candy if you want to be tall. 4-year-old: I’ll just be small and happy.