@robfee: Here lies Aunt Brenda. Trampled to death on the day after Thanksgiving trying to save $18 on a crock pot. Rest in peace, sweet angel.
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@dave_cactus: WAITRESS: Would you like to try a quesadilla? ME: I can barely eat one dilla, let alone a whole case.
@Douchekevin: Girlfriend kept nagging me to take her home to meet my family, so I did. Her and my wife aren't getting along.