@therepoguy: "Here taste this " followed by a 32 minute speech on all the ingredients.
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@Mr_Kapowski: Even if you're single, always blame a declined credit card on your fictional spouse at the register.
@Book_Krazy: Boss: You're late! On Friday, I made it clear that anyone arriving late would be fired Me: Well I didn't know! I ducked out early on Friday
@matt_simpson84: The best thing about Facebook is learning about all the 19-year-olds that miss the 80s.