@therepoguy: "Here taste this " followed by a 32 minute speech on all the ingredients.
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@DaveWeasel: If you don't like the way you look naked, remember; by the time you have your clothes off, its the other person's problem.
@Breadery: I've spent my whole life trying to find a girl with a psychiatric disorder that makes her think she's a woodpecker.
@bobvulfov: [posing nude] ME: make sure to capture all of my body's contours DMV GUY: again, this is entirely inappropriate for a license photo