@nedroid: here's my dating advice. Take your date to go-karts. everyone loves go-karts. I just solved your life. you're welcome
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@WilliamAder: Pretty sure the guy who named them "walkie talkies" got fired before he could name other military equipment.
@Try2StopME: Tim Cook: "We're excited to annou-" #Apple fans: "We'll buy it." Tim Cook: "Let me fini-" Apple fans: "We'll buy that too." #iPhone6
@Xoolun: Being a single man has to be depressing when you think that even a guy like Hitler had a girlfriend.
@hippieswordfish: [1st date] *stuffing face* sorry i eat a lot when im nervous 'u know ur eating a candle right?' yah *points to napkin* u gonna finish that