@brichie13: He's an owl with an attitude. She's a hawk who will take him to church. This fall, Sundays become Fundays on ABC's new hit 'Birds of Pray'!
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@trevso_electric: Just saw a touching BP commercial where BP congratulates BP for doing some of what BP was legally required to do after it wrecked the earth.
@3sunzzz: I experienced a potato famine once; it was the longest night of my life. Narrator: Ursula ran out of vodka.
@BitterKrust: "Does this hurt?" "YES!" "What about this?" "OW!" *Dr. writes notes* "Patient shows symptoms of pain when stabbed with knife. Keep updates."