@TheRealRHB: Hey Alaska wilderness show person who is about to freeze to death with no hope in sight, maybe just cuddle up with the crew filming you...
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@brian_bilston: Here is a poem for #NationalDrinkWineDay entitled "The Problem of Writing a Poem in the Shape of a Wine Glass".
@Marcmywords2: Hey dad, the hospital called, patients are trying to rest, could you please turn down your television.
@bourgeoisalien: I feel like maybe if God didn't spend all his time helping people win at sports and awards shows he'd have time to fix some shit