@davedittell: hey atheists: if God isn't real then who did I just give my credit card information to over the phone?
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@garrydavenport: "It's 3am and everyone is asleep. Must run into random rooms as fast as I can and jump on everything" - cats
@murfer28: I don't want to lock my account because I like to help my X's feel better about themselves when they check in & make sure I'm still a drunk.
@fillthevacuum: Don't get it. Heard the phrase "keep your friends clothes & keep your enemies clothes, sir". Now I have a bunch of naked people angry at me.