@Cpin42: HEY CALEB- YOUR COW IS INFERTILE AND YOUR SISTER LIKES DANCING.
-Amish trash talk
@clindsaysway: Sleeping Beauty taught me that:
1. I'm not the laziest girl in the land
2. If you sleep long enough, strange men break in & do stuff to you.
@sixfootcandy: My waxer just told me a hilarious story about ripping out a client's tampon during a bikini wax.
I guess she doesn't remember me.
@koalaslament: I try and avoid picking up turtles on the side of the road. Just in case they're in the middle of a race.
@tombomp: I love wikipedia
@aka_fatman: Morpheus: If you take the red pill, I will show you what the Matrix is.
Neo: *ingests pill* Whoa.
Morpheus: It's also a powerful laxative.