@thatcarlygirl: Hey, cooking directions on the sides of packages: Nobody knows the wattage of their microwave.
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@PyrBliss: A dragonfly just landed on my face an I reacted the same way I'd react if an actual dragon had landed on my face.
@RealJinjaNinja: Three steps to start a relationship. 1- buy a sheep 2- name it "relation" 3- now you have a relationsheep.
@iwearaonesie: Marriage is one person sitting on the couch eating Cheetos while the other looks for the remote because she can't hear the TV