@LeonEarlgrey: Hey girl are you a capri sun? Because i want to stab you.
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@5hael: *smashes car through your living room* Fancy meeting you here, have you been getting my text messages?
@squirrel74wkgn: [at the club] Me: ...everyone seemed to be just fine with Superman wearing red knee high boots Her: Just take them off
@angibangie: Him: I love nerd girls Me: Cool! Did you know the human body can't feel water, only a change in temperature? Him: no. not like that.