@LeonEarlgrey: Hey girl are you a capri sun? Because i want to stab you.
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@Chumpstring: Keep a few cat turds in your pockets, just in case a cop searches you. He will get cat poop on his hands, and you can laugh. It's all legal.
@joejwest: [hat shop] OWNER: Sir stop or I'll call the police UNICORN: [surrounded by damaged hats] No one will believe you
@desi_princess: No thanks officer. I don't even give strange men my phone number, and you're asking for my license and registration.