@ImFordTough: hey girl are you my ceiling fan because i'm pretty hot but also too lazy to get up and turn you on
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@PeteBlackburn: Biden: I wonder if I’ll still get free ice cream when I’m no longer VP Obama: Joe, we have bigger problems. Biden:
@PoblicMenace: If using your 4yo as a remote control to fetch things makes you a bad parent, then I'm a bad parent... A bad parent with an ice cold beer.
@GrantTanaka: "I was thinking of all the shit I hate, so I made a list of all the shit I hate" *notices you don't care *adds you to list of shit I hate