@YourFavMexi_Can: Hey girl, you smell like you're going to give me the wrong number.
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@Tharin_P: Why learn a second language, when you don't have anything interesting to say in your first one?
@XplodingUnicorn: My 6-year-old walked into the room and said, "Don't worry, Dad. I'm OK." Time to search the house for whatever she destroyed.
@GroperCleveland: MTV has ordered a reality show to follow a group of virgins. That sounds very interesting and riveting and get that camera out of my face.
@GrantTanaka: Bruce Wayne was terrified of bats & he became Batman, so anyway that's why I became ClownBaboonDentistMan