@daemonic3: "Hey! Guess what just popped in my head?!?" -- My dying words if I had an aneurysm
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@BuckyIsotope: *being pulled away by security from flamingo pen at the zoo with a handful of pink feathers and a black eye* HE STARTED IT
@TheToddWilliams: Man: You've been very loyal but it's best we part ways Dog: I don't understand. What's the problem? Man: Your talking kinda freaks me out.
@pleatedjeans: [sees kid crying in grocery store] hey little guy [kneels down to his level] Can you please move you're blocking the Cinnamon Toast Crunch?