@nachosarah: hey guys maybe girls are so cold all the time because you make us shave off all our hair
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@Thynebear: [on the phone with wife] Honey, who do you like better, Hulk Hogan or Jafar from Aladdin? "Tell me why." [winks at tattoo artist] No reason.
@Los01001111: My Wife does this cute thing where she says that "actions speak louder than words" and then gets pissed at me for just nodding.
@AndyAsAdjective: "any ideas?" let's tie a bunch of helium balloons together & then hold onto the strings "whoa whoa whoa, let's not get carried away"
@XplodingUnicorn: Don’t do drugs, kids. The extra demand will drive up the price for the rest of us.