@panmidwest: ME: you really put the cute in executione-
WARDEN: alright hit the switch
@ehdannyboy: Before pulled pork, pork just used to stand on the edge of the dance-floor, nodding to the music and looking cool.
@AristotlesNZ: Wife: How's the baby?
Me: He keeps trying to shove socks thru the mail slot.
Wife: Aw. His socks or yours?
Me: Socks is the neighbor's cat..
@BlackCatBettie: My favorite Yoga Pose is the Upward Facing Couch Potato.
@Wussawilla: Coworker: My husband's an angel.
Me: You're lucky.. mine's still alive.
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