@wesleybordelon: Hey guys, what's the name of that movie where Michael Cera plays a socially awkward teenager?
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@0point5twins: OMG... JUST OPENED A CUPBOARD AND ALL MY POSTAGE STAMPS ARE PREGNA- Oh wait, it's Ravioli.
@dxblarssonENG: Teenage daughter called me an old fart. We both laughed and then I changed the password to our wifi.
@Cyd10e: There are some people who when they hit rock bottom, they refuse to just lie there... They just pick up a shovel and started digging.