@StymieBrewer: Hey, hey...calm down please. Stop crying. I think all babies are ugly, not just yours.
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@MikeCanRant: People wont mess with you if you eat a cup of yogurt and then smash it on your forehead because youre tough and have healthy bowel movements
@ScottLinnen: Imagine the towering achievements in aquatecture if sawfish & hammerhead sharks ever get their shit together
@SCbchbum: According to rom coms, I haven't met the perfect guy because I've never chased an important paper down the block in a gust of wind.
@wickedsuga: *buys extra movie ticket seat so I'll have a place to put my microwave bc I'll be damned if I'm paying that much for popcorn