@yaseen_moi: Hey, I lost my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?
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@BossyBritches72: Dog keeps sighing melodramatically. I know he wants me to ask him what's wrong, but I'm not falling for it.
@HeMightBeJason: Grabbed Pizza Roll. Thought "my god that is so hot it's burning my fingers" and immediately popped it in my mouth. I'm a goddamn genius.
@RawspberryJamb: "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back it's yours" - Inventors of boomerangs