@glittergirlD43: Hey NSA... I accidentally deleted an email... Can I get you to forward me your copy?
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@possibilyss: In hindsight, i shouldn't have said 'surprise me' when the judge was about to sentence me
@YourAnMoron: Judge "Why are you divorcing her?" Me "She changed the station during Bohemian Rhapsody." J "You get half her stuff." *air guitar solo*