@grimpossible: "Hey son, we really love you but we posted a picture of you on Instagram and nobody liked it which is why we're giving you up for adoption."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@adamthislife: Jesus only had 12 followers, also one sold him out to die and another unfollowed Him right before He died. So I guess I'm not doing too bad.
@samuelhlowe: Chasing a Pringles can down a slope is the closest I've ever been to hunting my own food.
@earfdae: She said she wanted to bump uglies. So, naturally, I got all showered & freshened up and then I rammed my Ford Pinto into her Honda Element.