@TheTweetOfGod: Hey U.S.: if every now and then I heard a "God PLEASE bless America", maybe you'd have better luck. #manners
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@AnOrangeSNES: How to build a nested list 1) Start like this A) Then do this Bird: I live here now 2) Make sure to get the bird out Bird: NO
@NoticablyBacon: *Meeting GF parents* What are your intentions with our daughter? Uh I need someone to sing the girl parts of Grease songs with me
@DamonHunzeker: Vader: "I am your father." Luke: "I am your father." Vader: "Stop copying me." Luke: "Stop copying me." Vader: "Shut up." Luke: "Shut up."
@DrDogMD: DR DOG: have you been taking your diabetes meds daily? PATIENT: no DR DOG: *hits him on the nose with a rolled up newspaper* Bad patient!