@madamezooble: Hey! Welcome to Urban Outfitters. Are you a baby-sized woman or a woman-sized man?
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@nd_L_: If only the person that named “walkie talkies” had been in charge of naming so many more household objects.
@tastefactory: Hey u should give your secret boss this Coke. *bottle says "Share a Coke w/ the Drug Maker Guy"* *undercover cop's fake mustache falls off*
@looktothepickle: Got a cut on my arm, someone on Facebook sent me healing vibes and PRESTO! two weeks later the cut fully healed this is not a joke people