@DamienFahey: Hey white people, which filter are we using this year to Instagram the Pumpkin Spice Latte?
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@TheMichaelRock: Me *wakes up from nap* Wife: what are you doing up? Me: was I not supposed to wake up? Wife[nervous laugh] what?
@platinum2000: [Haunted House] Ghost:You've been here a week Me: I like you G:You knew what this was M: I thought I was your boo G: I say that to everyone