@Ristolable: HI MOM. YOU'RE GONNA BE SO PROUD. I JUST WON AN ARGUMENT ON THE INTERNET. Sorry caps lock was still on from the argument. But I won.
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@Brianhopecomedy: My 4 year old told me to just turn the tire around as the top part isn't flat. I don't care if it's wrong - that's still some great logic.
@Storminika: If men could get pregnant, not only would abortions be legal, I think McDonald's would be doing it.
@pleatedjeans: [spiders pour into room] THEYRE EVERYWHERE [group of tap dancers enter] ALRIGHT MEN THIS IS WHAT WEVE TRAINED FOR
@jergarl: I'm ONLY remembering to drink fluids because you told me to. NOT because fluids are literally the only thing you CAN drink, KAREN.