@Ristolable: HI MOM. YOU'RE GONNA BE SO PROUD. I JUST WON AN ARGUMENT ON THE INTERNET. Sorry caps lock was still on from the argument. But I won.
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@LizHackett: "What if I took the dumbest person I know, got them severely drunk, and challenged them to finish my sentences?" -- inventor of Autocorrect
@dshack8: 2nd Rule of Parent Club: If your kid suddenly says "I think I'd better wash my hands", don't question them. I repeat, DO NOT QUESTION THEM.
@PantsDonkey: Everyone please stop saying that today's date only happens once. EVERY date only happens once, that's how time works.
@LetsQuoteComedy: In 1000 years, archaeologists will find tanning beds and think we fried people as punishments.