@Ristolable: HI MOM. YOU'RE GONNA BE SO PROUD. I JUST WON AN ARGUMENT ON THE INTERNET. Sorry caps lock was still on from the argument. But I won.
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@jonnysun: COP 1: whys there a dead scuba diver in the forest?? COP 2: easy…he was in the water they drop on forest fires WEIRD SERIAL KILLER: no no NO
@HuajatollaChic: At least dogs look at you when you're talking with them as if to say, hell yeah I'd talk to you, but I'm a dog.
@calamitydaisy: I feel a burst of superiority when I trick a fly into flying out of my car window.