@fatguythe: Hid my daughters ipod in my other daughters room cause they've been getting along lately and there's nothing on tv tonight.
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@iwearaonesie: "UNLESS WE'RE OUT OF CHEESE THERE'S NO REASON TO SCREAM LIKE THAT!" - me to my kid whenever he throws a tantrum
@Henry_3k: *Goes back in time to kill the inventors of Twitter. Returns home to amaze friends on Facebook with endless jokes about vodka & pizza.*