@SkinnerSteven: HIPSTER COP: *into radio* "We've got a 13-88 in progress...it's a pretty rare crime, you probably wouldn't know it"
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@dumbbeezie: How to handle a one night stand the next morning 1. Put on Titanic 2. He's gone, that's it
@greg_vee: If intelligence runs in your family, I can only guess it tripped and fell before it got to you.
@KentWGraham: Given their destructive force to homes, kids’ birthday parties should get names like hurricanes do. Birthday Party Hugo.
@Darlainky: Vandalism should be allowed on any vehicle who's alarm has been going off for more than 5 minutes.