@sween: Hipster sushi restaurants only serve eye rolls.
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@hello_saylor: Hotel room bathrooms really overestimate how much I want to see my own naked body.
@briangaar: DID YOU KNOW: If you don't eat animal products, you will take it out on everyone else forever?
@stanleybehrman: From my hospital bed it occurred to me, that i could never work in a hospital because there are too many opportunities to nap.
@LoveNLunchmeat: I miss being a kid and playing cowboys and Indians. Now whenever I chase people around with a tomahawk I get arrested.