@TheTimmyToes: *hires 2 personal trainers and makes one of them train the other one*
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@joejwest: SECURITY GUARD: [speaking into the cuff of his shirt] The president is on his way to the car LITTLE MOUSE THAT LIVES IN HIS SLEEVE: Ok cool
@Darlainky: I'm never more irritated by fashion than when I'm trying to stuff something in a fake pocket!
@chelliet22: Maybe the reason you're not having *sexual intercourse* is because you call it sexual intercourse.