@CovertAgentP: Hollywood sets impossible standards we can never live up to. Not even once have I saved people from dinosaurs with my knowledge of Unix.
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@stockejock: Grandma, stop asking people what they're supposed to be for Halloween-this is Walmart.
@just1fool: My six replaced the toilet paper roll all on her own and now I'm wondering who her real dad is.
@jctwritesstuff: Yeah, I know what my neighbors wear to bed. Not because I look in their windows; I just see them during the day at Walmart.