@BrettDruck: Homophobia isnt much about fear, true, but I wish it was more like Arachnaphobia(I heard that every year in your sleep you swallow 7 gays)
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@primawesome: I pet my dog and he didn't wag his tail. Is he seeing someone else? Is the magic gone? Do we need to spice things up? I'll dress like a cat.
@XplodingUnicorn: If you still have a landline, I assume you also own a butter churn and ride a dinosaur to work.
@Okeating: I didn't take my husband's name when I got married. I figured it'd be confusing if we were both called Keith.
@iwearaonesie: mom: no TV for a week! dad: and after you take a bath you can't use your hands to get out of the tub *sons jaw drops* mom: [whispers] nice