@MrMJCox: Honestly why do I bother attempting this shit
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@abbycohenwl: Woman: Is it a boy or a girl, doctor? Doctor: It's a mango. A perfectly ripe mango Woman: Oh thank GOD. I hate babies
@DosieDoe: US Loretta Lynch confirms that all 7 FIFA officials dramatically threw themselves onto the ground faking injury when arrested earlier today.
@OneFunnyMummy: Mo' money mo' problems might be true, but I'd still like to find out for myself.