@therepoguy: "Honey, can you bring me a
roll of toilet paper?"
Toilet paper- "I have a boyfriend"
@JudgmentalGay: Me: *breathes"
My parents: you need to watch that attitude young man.
@FuckabillyRex: I get hit with a lot of folding chairs for someone that's not a professional wrestler.
@Book_Krazy: 9: What did that message on the TV say
Me: It said, the film has been modified to fit our screen
9: How do they know what size TV we have?
@Godhatespants: Dishes are like boyfriends. My roommate should really stop doing mine
@LMLMadness: My Mom keeps warning me about talking to strangers on the Internet.
I'm 34 now Mom. I don't talk to them. I sleep with them.