@philyuck: Horse-drawn carriages are pretty cool but the horses should learn to draw other stuff
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@bombchelle87: How am I supposed to drink responsibly when responsibility is the whole damn reason I drink?
@Storminika: I asked a blonde friend to check if my blinker was working, her reply was 'Yes, it is. No, it's not. Yes, it is. No, it's not.'
@MelanieShebel: I'm not saying the Internet lies, but there is an alarming discrepancy in the number of iPads I've won and the number that I actually own.