@philyuck: Horse-drawn carriages are pretty cool but the horses should learn to draw other stuff
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@Sophie2078: *my skills with compliments 5yo: You are a beautiful princess! Me: And you are a... child.
@shutupmikeginn: You learn something new everyday. Yesterday I learned eating 29 SlimJims gives me diarrhea. Today I learned eating 28 also gives me diarrhea
@Liber_what: Me: hey squirrel, dnt steal d pigeon's food, the eggs are about to hatch S: u stole a cake frm ur roomate Me: Me: here, take the eggs too