@TheCiscoKidder: How about a ceiling fan with brakes so I don't have to stand there for 10 seconds wondering if I actually turned it off.
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: No matter how adorable you think your young son is, it's best you not refer to him as a "lady killer", it might end up being true.
@AlexvanBeek: I would've thrown a coin in the water fountain and wished for all the money in it, but I just waited 'til it was dark instead.
@OtherDanOBrien: ME: I've expressed this political opinion so clearly, there's no way anyone could misinterpret it. THE INTERNET: lmao challenge accepted
@shahnischmani: I JUST CONSUMED SO MUCH SUGAR THAT I FEEL ALL SHOUTY IN MY HEAD AND CAPS LOCKY AND HOLY CRAP HOW DO PEOPLE DO ACTUAL DRUGS